Love is not selfish. What is love?

There are many kinds of love. What I am considering is romantic love. I saw a movie, Starman, where an alien crash lands on Earth and while trying to get to a pickup location he forces a woman to take him there.  Along the way they grow closer and he asks her questions about humans. One of the questions is, "What is love?" She tells him that it is when someone cares more about someone else than they do themself. 

I was told that is why people are in abusive relationships but my answer to that is that will only happen if the other person does not love you as well.
If a person truly loves another they do not hurt that person physically or emotionally.
The way I act and the way I expect my partner to act is everything I do or say would be the same if that person were right beside me even when they are not there. 

If you want to get to know someone play a game with them. Maybe one that has money. Monopoly anyone? Win or lose, it will tell you about someone. It's only a game but some people just cannot be gracious losers or winners at anything. 

Selfish people do not make for good friends or relationships.